First of all… I’m so sorry to all of you guys if I ever make you people feel hurt due to the way I’m acting, speaking and/or interacting. I just realize that I’m ain’t that good in being socialize wit people (of course la with people cuz for sure I’m not getting social with goats or what). Seriously, I didn’t mean to be like that. My bad for being such a cruel person. But please don’t hate me just bcuz of this. Just get used with it and then you’ll be fine. So, WTH I’m babbling around? Actually, I want to explain you guys something that you never know about me through online communications. Yes, if I’m saying that the way I’m interact with friends in the virtual world and in reality is just the same, then I lied. To be honest, I’m more stereotype in real world compare to me in the online world…
Who ever met me in the real world (raise ur butt, well sound like I’m never touch my feet on the Earth???)? Well, it’s a good thing to know me in the online world as well as in the Real life. Sorry to say but I’m such a kind that can’t really memorize all the faces and the names of my friends; even the one that being a year with me in Dewan Kuliah and knows me better than I do to him/her.
During my high school years, I used to be involved in many school activities. Pusing sana, pusing sini is my ‘everytime’ part-time job, either to the staffs’ room, labs and everything. So, people used to saw me walking along the classes’ corridors, sometimes alone and some other time, in a partner. And at one point, when I attended for a GiatMara course, there is a girl say Hi to me and asked me if I ever met her during schooltime. And an automatic answer speech out from my mouth, sound somewhat like this…
Girl : Hey, remember me?
Me : Huh??? Not much… Actually, I just know u r from my school but I dun hav any idea who r u…
Girl : Ala, I always saw u walking off the corridor of my class…
Me : Owh really, sorry cuz I never notice u before.
Girl : Of course u do, it’s like u never look aside when u walk…
Me : Hehehe… (Muka bengang)
Kesian budak perempuan tu. Well, it’s true, sometimes I used to be like that. Busy kan? of course la I don’t have much time to care about what happened with other people. There’s some other worse cases like I even don’t have any idea with whom I’m talking with; e.g. when there is a girl, who is also my kuliah-mate, greeted me like it was the first time we met (she used to talk with me before). In a more pathetic condition, she remember my name?!! Owh God. Like why I’m so dumb not to remember her???! You guys would knows that the person will emotionally tersentuh hati dalam bentuk yang paling pedih (most simple word to explain it is : SENTAP)
Ok, last night, I was interviewed by some of my course-mate. They tell me how weird I could be, just becuz I don’t remember them. Hohoho. Basically, and for the very first time I realize bertapa teruknya perangai aku. Thanks to Aliah, Shamimi, Aida and Shahira sebab u guys dah bongkar banyak rahsia aku (Sorry arr Aida and Shahira, sumpah x ingt name td, tp of course la ak kenal korg. Blame my otak Ok). So, the conclusion is, I can ‘plainly in color’ remember someone even though they ever saw me, met me or a class with me. Do you know what did I mean for ‘plainly in color’? It’s like remembering someone in a physical preferences (face, height etc) and characteristic (good people, bad people, fuckin’ shit hypocrite/backstabber etc)
but seriously, aku lagi senang nak ingat orang yang jenis hipokrit and tikam belakang nie sebab ak janji aku akan balas dendam semula...
If that particular person don’t have a significant relationship with me I mean like acquaintances, street people etc… they might be remembered by me in a ‘plain as white’ way, the way where I don’t have any significant purpose to remember him/her.
So, how can I approach you??? Well it’s almost unusual for me to approach people bcuz it’s not my style. Instead I love to meet in a group compare to meeting one-on-one… I’ll be just like Hinata Hyugga in Naruto cuz being that shy… So, let revert the subject. So, how can you approach me? Well, first of all, I would like to highlight some important thing that you suppose to know about me:
1st It’s a hard thing for me to remember people name especially if you just meet me somewhere before. And I akan buat muka impress mcm kenal but actually I dun know you or in blurr.
2nd You may find that I will not start the conversation. Instead I’m just smiling and then bow down my head and keep my eyes down until anyone of us trigger start the talk. hahaha
3rd I’m such a super-shy on the first meet. And you will know that my shyness level dropping slowly as I’m start to talk.
4th I’ll become more ‘mesra’ when I like you. But this not to mean I dislike kawan-kawan yang xberapa mesra (kawan tetap kawan. No friends mean I’m such a kera sumbang la). Owh, I'll turn out to be loyal member of a small group of friends. It's like a secret society but it's just friends; not that 'conspiracy' secret society.
5th don’t touch me at the first meet. I think most people don’t do that la. It’s ok if you want to shake hands or poke to greet or what but to touch mg things, or anything eg, hair, hands etc, it’s a no-no. First, aku akan fikir, ape kejadah kau main sentuh-sentuh nie, aku tak boleh arr kalu jenis camni. Kedua, nak makan penampar ker??? And basically, ak pantang orang sentuh kepala ak… Nak kena sumpah!!!!
6th There’s no 6th. If there’s any, maybe you can confirm it out via my Formspring. (Saje nak penuh sampai number favorite aku, 6)
I think this would be enough la. Too much information leaked will reveal the real me… So, it’s would be better if I stay cloaked in the dark shadow, and when the sun rise up, I will slowly show up myself. No more cloaking, just the real me… (Wow, metaphor giler). Hope you guys understand this la… So, this is it. The DEAN'S REALITY TRILOGY